Outreach performances, where we get to play for the community, is one way that I as a member of a New Horizons band can give back, but it is more than that. Really, I should say that it is more selfish than that. While I truly hope that the people listening to us playing are enjoying the music, the excitement of the performance is mine. The fulfillment, the accomplishments are mine. I am a very selfish person. But I also enjoy the feeling of helping others to find those same feelings. It is often a complicated duel between the dual feelings of outreach and selfishness that sometimes makes me sit back and question my motives. Am I here for others' enjoyment or am I here to help myself? My daughter recently asked me what I did when I had my mid-life crisis, that time in your life when you assess your accomplishments and regrets and do something wild and out of character. I told her "I joined the band!" She laughed. It made me think though, about why I joined the band. Am I here to perform for others or am I here to help myself? Well heck, you only get one chance at this life, as far as I know, so I'm doing it for myself. I will continue to play in a band because it is something that I have wanted to do since I was a kid. I will encourage others to join the band and orchestra so that I will have a place to play and so I can feel the contentment from their experiences of excitement. I will continue to be selfish and play those outreach concerts so that I can get the gratification from watching an audience enjoy our music. And I hope others do enjoy our music and that it makes them feel good or remember good experiences in their own lives.
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AuthorDaniel Zarka Archives
March 2019
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